Network from the TV Ratings Guide “Presentation Galore”

Episode 1×03 – “Presentations Galore”

By: Jessica Boggs

FADE IN:

INT. BUSINESS HALLWAY – MORNING

JESSE is early to work for an important meeting. He meets up with KASEY, and the scene is set to be business as usual.

KASEY

(with a smile)

Jesse! You’re early!

JESSE

I know, shock, right?

KASEY

(shrugs, then chuckles)

Well, let’s get to the office.

CUT TO:

INT. BUSINESS HALLWAY LOOP – CONTINUOUS

KASEY and JESSE walk briskly to JESSE’S office.

KASEY

Say, upfronts are today.

JESSE

(with a smile)

Yes, they are.

KASEY

Wow. It’s already here.

JESSE

With Psych Med and Marietta ordered to series, plus reality TV, I better hope that they both hit. Because if they don’t…

KASEY

You’re in trouble. We’re in trouble.

JESSE

Exactly.

KASEY

Let’s hurry to the office.

CUT TO:

INT. JESSE’S OFFICE – CONTINUOUS

JESSE hands KASEY a stack of papers. They are reports of pilots and series orders.

JESSE

I managed to get these from my computer.

KASEY

(in shock)

Wow! I wonder if it is too late for this.

JESSE

Bring those to the president when you get a chance.

KASEY

Will do, partner!

KASEY exits. JESSE then goes into a state of reflection.

He polishes his best suit with his hand. Then the phone rings.

JESSE

(into phone)

Hello?

It happens to be ASH on the phone.

ASH (V.O.)

I see you found your reports.

JESSE

Uh, yeah. Why?

ASH (V.O.)

Are you seriously putting a potential hole in the schedule? One more series should have been ordered!

JESSE

(in shock, into phone)

I get that. But…

ASH (V.O.)

But nothing. Now, since upfronts are today, I don’t want you to screw things up again. Your job is on the line. If anything happens again, you are fired!

JESSE

(trembles)

Okay.

ASH (V.O.)

Do I make myself clear?

JESSE

Yes, sir!

The phone conversation ends right there. JESSE then takes a moment to himself. This is not the first time his job is on the line. He then gets back up, takes a glass of wine and sips on it.

FADE OUT:

FADE IN:

INT. GREEN ROOM – AFTERNOON

LEAH and ASH stand in this scene. LEAH polishes ASH’s suit. He appears nervous, as if he is about to give the biggest performance of his life. LEAH then looks calmly at him.

LEAH

You nervous, Ash?

ASH

I don’t know if I could go out there, Leah.

LEAH

(with a smile)

You got this. Don’t worry.

ASH proceeds to hug LEAH, as tightly as he possibly can. He then looks at her. There is some obvious unresolved sexual tension in the room, but for some apparent reason, there is a realization in the moment. The alarm sounded, indicating that there is five minutes to be spared.

ASH

I guess that’s my cue. Gotta show them how it’s done.

LEAH

(excited)

Let me know how it goes!

CUT TO:

INT. BACKSTAGE – THIRTY SECONDS LATER

ASH stands in attention, waiting to be called to present.

PRESENTER (V.O.)

And now, here’s our president, Ash!

CUT TO:

INT. AUDITION STAGE – CONTINUOUS

ASH quickly jogs into the podium, greeted with an excited looking press.

ASH

Hello, folks! Welcome to the annual Network Up-Fronts! We got some exciting shows premiering this fall. On to the schedule…

The screen pops up with an alluring presentation of the schedule.

ASH

(with a commanding presence)

On Mondays at 8pm, we have season 3 of Real Hollywood. Followed by season 2 of Glamanour Heights at 9pm.

ASH then walks stage left away from the podium. He then pulls his most charmingly convincing network smile for the cameras as he continues his upfront presentation. The press then stands there in nervous anticipation.

ASH

On Tuesdays, it’s comedy night! At 8pm we have returning comedy Life with Jess, followed by new comedy Marietta at 8:30. At 9pm, we have the returning Tuesday Night Sketch. Wednesday night features reality TV love at its finest. We have two hours of The Choice at 8pm.

CUT TO:

INT. BACKSTAGE – CONTINUOUS

JESSE watches the entire presentation in nervous anticipation.

KASEY enters the scene.

KASEY

(shrugs)

We may be in trouble now after this.

JESSE

Oh s***! You may be right. I could lose my job.

The phone rings.

JESSE

Hello? Wait? What the hell?

He promptly gets the phone out of his ear.

JESSE

Trouble is starting in the green room.

KASEY

(in shock)

We gotta do something!

CUT TO:

INT. AUDITION STAGE – CONTINUOUS

ASH is back on the podium.

ASH

Moving on to Thursday nights. Returning at a new time at 8pm is critically-acclaimed drama The President’s Daughter, followed by new drama Psych Med.

The audience gasps.

ASH

Moving on…

LEAH then enters the stage to interrupt ASH. It gets dicey. They face each other in surprise.

LEAH

(angrily)

Ash, two women just trespassed into the green room! What do we do?

ASH

Go back into the green room and escort them out.

The audience lets out a huge sigh of surprise. LEAH then exits right. ASH then returns to the podium.

ASH

Okay. I apologize for the commotion. Moving on to Friday nights! We have two hours of Headlines at 8. Here at the network, we are pleased to offer more original programming than ever before!

REPORTER #1 (O.S.)

Excuse me, what the heck is Psych Med?

ASH

(startled)

I will get to new programs in a minute.

CUT TO:

INT. GREEN ROOM – CONTINUOUS

JESSE and KASEY enter the scene. The twosome then sees a clearly angered LEAH confronting CHARLIE and a manhandled ACTOR #1 from last week’s church scene. Seeing what they couldn’t un-see, which is a Dynasty-style catfight fresh off the tabloid press.

JESSE

(frightened)

What the hell is going on here? What the hell are you two doing here making a commotion?

CHARLIE

(smirks)

I’m here to teach this sucker that actor outrage is not going to renew a show.

ACTOR #1

Oh yeah, b****? Why don’t you tell that garbage to Timeless? We have millions of fans and you know it.

CHARLIE

But not enough to watch your show, honey. Stop bluffing!

KASEY

(turns to JESSE)

Jesse, you need to do something. This is about to get out of hand and fast!

JESSE

(walks toward CHARLOTTE and ACTOR #1)

Ladies, this is not the time for fighting.

CHARLIE

(huffs)

Oh yeah? She clearly needs a reality check that nobody knows who she is!

ACTOR #1

Why don’t you…

CHARLIE then grabs ACTOR #1 by the hair. KASEY tries to break up the fight, but gets injured massively. JESSE then tries to break it up, but is kicked in the teeth.

JESSE

(smooths his clothes)

That’s it, aargh! I’m calling security!

CHARLIE

I’m going to teach you something, you twat!

KASEY

(in shock)

Stop it, please! Stop it!

ACTOR #1

Aaaarrrrggghhhhh…

CHARLOTTE then grabs onto ACTOR #1 and body slams her onto the table. As KASEY takes her glasses off, ACTOR #1 then gets back up and tears CHARLOTTE’s clothes. Then, the catfighters then slam into KASEY into a three-way WWE showdown of the ages. KASEY tries to fend for herself as she kicks her way out of the brawl. JESSE is on the phone with a security guard.